Susan Cox
The breeze ruffles the aspen leaves and the stream gently tumbles over rocks as people fill the pavilion. Tables with red checkered tablecloths are covered with an assortment of food and coolers hold a variety of drinks. Chairs and blankets surround the pavilion to provide more seating. Chatter and laughter fill the air as cousins, siblings, aunts and uncles reconnect with one another.
My husband and I just returned from his family reunion in Utah. All of his siblings and their spouses were able to attend as well as most of the grand and great-grandchildren. Our picnic lunch followed a group family photo. The previous evening, we had separate gatherings for the siblings and for the cousins.
My husband was a bit worried about how two of his siblings would get along because there’s been a rift between them for a couple of years. Happily, they were willing to talk to each other and heal the rift. Both value family and being together in person facilitated their reconciliation. Unfortunately, a few family members chose not to attend due to tension with other family members. We hope those tensions will ease eventually too.
My husband’s family is large, which can be a bit overwhelming for me, but I enjoyed watching all the cousins interacting, particularly my stepchildren with their cousins. I am always amazed at how well cousins get along even when they don’t see each other very often. Somehow that family bond makes the connection easier.
Maintaining positive connections with your family brings many benefits such as improved mental health, security, a greater sense of purpose, and enhanced overall well-being. (See bondingbeacon.com/family-relationships/ for more info.) Keeping those connections strong requires effort, especially when you don’t live close to each other. You can write letters, send emails or texts, talk on the phone, or make video calls. My siblings and I get together over zoom every couple of months and my kids and I try to do so once a month.
Another way to connect with family is to share family stories. We got to Utah a few days before the actual reunion. We spent one day with my stepson and his family going on one of my husband’s favorite drives—the scenic byway around Mt. Nebo. We stopped at overlooks along the way, and he shared some of his experiences when he had visited there before. We also stopped at the scout camp where he worked for several summers, and he shared stories from his time working there. We appreciated gaining some new insights about him. Another stop was a visit to the cemetery to see family graves and learn a bit more about the extended family.
Family isn’t always who you’re biologically related to. I was happy to also visit with some of my ex-husband’s family that I’ve stayed in touch with and renew those bonds in person. The benefits of connecting with family also apply to other close relationships, so I’m looking forward to getting together with some of my good friends here in the next few days.
Whomever you consider family, I hope you can find ways to stay connected.
Susan Cox is one of The Republic’s community columnists, and all opinions expressed are those of the writer. She is an avid reader, an outdoor enthusiast, a mother, a grandmother, and an adjunct instructor of English at Indiana University Columbus. Send comments to [email protected].
